Clarity

As we weighed the traditional surgery and the endoscopic surgery, we felt no clarity. One day, we felt one way – the next day, the other.

We talked to several medical professionals who we know and trust, and it seemed that they all leaned toward the traditional method: It’s been around forever, it works, it’s done once and for all, and there is no helmet.

Then on the following Friday, our pediatrician called to check on David and see how our appointments were going.

I told him we visited with the surgeon he referred and liked her, but the surgery was so invasive. 

He agreed and went on to tell us that he had only met Dr. Jimenez once, and didn’t know him because he was somewhat new in town. He said he had read a bit on the endoscopic surgery since our last appointment, and said that each surgery worked, and that it really came down to our decision.

“I know you probably get this question a lot, and probably hate it, but what would you do if this were your child?” I asked.

Such a loaded question, I know, but his answer put me at such ease.

He said he’d have to get on his knees and seek the Lord on this one, and really rely on his peace to guide him. He said that in his life, all of the major decisions he has had to make have been so evident that he never had to question it. He brought up how he knew the hospital he was supposed to work in right when he walked into it, and mentioned a few other decisions that he just knew what he was supposed to do.

That spoke to me so much. When I walked onto the campus, I knew I was supposed to go to TCU for college; on our third date, I knew I was going to marry Chris; I knew when it was time to have Daniel, and I knew when it was time to have David.

I would know which surgery to choose for David.

He went on to say that if his daughter had this, a lesser invasive surgery, a smaller scar and a shorter recovery time would be appealing to him too.

And that validated me so much. It made me feel like a good momma, and not like I was naïve for looking into this newer, high-tech procedure.

The next day, Saturday, I called a woman whose son had the traditional surgery 26 years ago. She was a friend of a friend of Julie’s (Chris’s mom). She didn’t answer, but I left a message and hoped to hear back from her soon.

On Sunday, I thought about a college friend who I knew studied neurosurgery at UT Health Science Center – where Dr. Jimenez was the Chair of the Neurosurgery Department. I sent him a facebook message and asked his opinion of Dr. Jimenez.

Monday rolled around, and I saw I had gotten a message from Neal, my friend from college. He couldn’t speak highly enough of Dr. Jimenez. He said that he is a leader in the field of craniosynostosis correction, that his wife (Constance Barone) is a craniofacial surgeon, and they have collaborated to make the procedure good from both a “neuro” and a “cosmetic” point of view. He said we were very lucky to live in a place like San Antonio with a renowned pediatric neurosurgeon like Dr. Jimenez, who is very professional but also a very nice man. Above all else, he said is very good at what he does and doubted we would find anyone better than Dr. Jimenez. He said he knows many other surgeons who are truly impressed with his skill.

I felt excited when I read that.

And wouldn’t you know that that same morning, our phone rang. It was Nancy – the friend of a friend of Julie’s. She was wonderful. She answered some questions I had wondered about – like whether or not I would ever stop examining babies’ heads – she said I won’t. :) She also said it was a weird kind of ministry we have been given, but that the Lord is going to use this in so many neat ways throughout our lives.

We talked awhile, but a few parts really sunk in:

1. She said they got hair transplants for her son at 15 years old to try to cover the scar that stood out amongst his thick head of hair.
2. She also said that even if we didn’t get a helmet for David, we would wish we had one. They did not get a helmet after their traditional surgery, and she said that she chased her son around for 18 months in order to keep him from falling, hitting his head, or getting hurt. She said he even slept in between her and her husband for several months so he wouldn’t bump his head on the crib rails or fall off of a toddler bed.

The email and phone call on the same day were very confirming for me, but you know God ...well, he always outdoes himself.

That very same afternoon, I got an email from our old neighbor – remember the retired pediatrician I talked about in this post who didn’t think David would need surgery?

He said he had been trying to call us but our number had changed and asked me to call him as soon as possible.

I called him immediately.

I stepped into David's room for quietness, and the evening sun was hitting at a beautiful angle. The whole room was golden. I will never forget that.

He asked how David was doing, and I told him that our pediatrician did diagnose him and ordered C/T scans to confirm it, and that we had met with one pediatric neurosurgeon and would meet with another a week-and-a-half later.

He asked who, but hadn’t heard of  her since he had only retired in San Antonio, and had not worked here.

I didn’t know how much he knew about the surgeries, since I found that many pediatricians didn’t even know how to diagnose craniosynostosis, let alone about the surgeries there were to correct it.

I told him there was an endoscopic way now.

“Yes!” He said.

He asked who that surgeon was, and I told him it was David Jimenez.

He said THAT was why he called. He said the more he thought about David, the more he realized that he did have craniosynostosis and would need to be operated on.

He used to teach pediatrics at University of Missouri – Columbia School of Medicine, which is exactly where Dr. Jimenez and his wife invented the endoscopic procedure.

He was there when they invented it, and couldn’t say enough about him. He said we would be in great hands with him and wanted to make sure we had heard of, and got hooked up with, Dr. Jimenez.

I hung up and was in awe.

We prayed for a confirmation.

We and got three.

On the same day.

I told Chris, and called our families to tell them what had just happened.

When I called Chris’s family – they were in Houston visiting his aunt – they were relieved. They hadn’t said much about their opinions and supported us regardless, but said they were all talking about it the night before. Chris’s dad had choked up just describing the traditional surgery to his aunt, and though they didn’t tell us, they all agreed that the endoscopic surgery was a wonderful way to treat it. (And if you know his very traditional grandmother who wholeheartedly believes in old-fashioned medicine, and a lot of it, this is huge!)

Chris was pretty sure he agreed, but still had some searching to do. So searching is exactly whathe did. He said that one of his greatest confirmation was when he googled “Best Surgeon + Craniosynostosis + Texas” and Dr. Jimenez’s name was #1 on the list. Ha!

God knows what we need: I need a choir singing and a light shining on the answer, while Chris just needs it written plain as day on google.com!

Oh, the joys and differences of men and women…

All I know is that when God speaks, He speaks clearly.

When I think about that Monday, November 23, I am overwhelmed with a still peace and glowing warmth I cannot even describe. I am not sure I  have ever felt anything like that.

God is so good, and I was excited to meet with the helmet company and the neurosurgeon on the next Wednesday.